Ever Beside You, Katniss Everdeen
by sozzy
Summary: We know what happened to Katniss, but what about everyone else? It jolts from 3rd person to 1st person, but here is more from and about Peeta, Gale, Prim, Haymitch . . . and I don't own Katniss or the Mockingjay books.
1. Reaping and Training

_Haymitch feels guilty for his part in the reaping of Katniss and Peeta_:

"I gotta get this off my chest _now_: the odds were 100% in favor of Katniss Everdeen and Peeta Mellark well before The Reaping of the 74th Games. See, Katniss was the perfect proto-Mockingjay and she and Peeta made the perfect proto-couple so I set them up - in the exact right place, at the exact right time - for the war against the Capitol.

"Actually, it was Plutarch and I who stacked the deck so that Katniss and Peeta were selected for the 74th Games. I kinda wish she knew the truth so I could have one less guilty secret on what passes for my crappy conscience but she'd probably kill me if I told her the truth. So I'm writing it down and hiding it in my victor's house where she'll find it if she looks through the house af ter I'm gone. Then she'll probably go kill Plutarch.

"Plutarch recruited me into his rebel organization years ago because he liked my cover – a drunken victor in a rotten mood. He told me (I'm trying to quote here) "The very _i-__**de**__-a_ that _any_one would entrust _highly_ sensitive, indeed _dan_ger_ous,_ infor_ma_tion to **you-**_ou_ is _ri-__**di**__-cu_lous, therefore you would be a _per_fect rebel if you could be just a _leettle_ more sober when we need you?" in that stupid Capitol accent. After my experience in the Games and after the Games I hated the Capitol with all that was left of me, and I wanted to kill off Snow even more than I wanted to be oblivious to the lifetime of boredom and sorrow I faced. So I perfected the art of partial sobriety that looks blind drunk and I got away with a lot of rude staring at the people of District 12, though the ones I was really interested in were the kids who might be tributes. Plutarch had plans for the 74th and 75th games and he needed the right tributes to play the parts he planned. About a month before the 74th Reaping Day, I proposed two possibles: Katniss and Gale Hawthorne.

"See, Plutarch intended to manipulate and choreograph the 74th and 75th games to unite all twelve districts together against the Capitol, and to ignite the rebellions already smoldering in maybe half the districts. Most of these rebel groups were fighting not the Capitol, but their own Peacekeepers. By and large the people of Panem hated the Capitol, but their personal goals were mostly just to stay alive to the next sunrise. We needed a greater goal – to bring down the Capitol – and a leadership that would unite all the districts against the one enemy – President Snow. We needed someone to personify the rebellion the way Snow personified the Capitol. This is all Plutarch's words, by the way. I could never come up with this kind of stuff. Plutarch's idea was that the Hunger Games are the only thing all districts have a stake in, so an icon of rebellion could arise naturally from the games, with a little of his manuevering. Plutarch's plot would start with two tributes from one district and the Games would mold him, her or both of them into this icon. I didn't get how Plutarch was going to pull this off, but he was confident he could do it. Plutarch told me to look for a girl with the skills and the spunk to get out alive, and a boy who would easily grow a crush on her.

"Well, Katniss was the obvious girl. The only girl really. You watch that girl striding through the Hob, trading and bartering, and you know #1. she can take care of herself, and #2. she's smarter than any tribute since maybe me. Smarter than Beetee, even if she doesn't understand electricity and whatnot. I mostly saw Katniss in the Hob and it's a rough crowd in there, but there weren't many guys who didn't stand up straighter, suck in the gut, and generally brighten up when she came in. The young guys like Darius were getting to be more and more like flies around a pot of honey with Katniss in the Hob. The boy she hunted with – Gale – I could see him getting more and more uncomfortable with all these lusty flies around Katniss. He clearly thought of Katniss as his girl. But you could tell she had no idea. She was as oblivious to all this attention as it was possible to be and not be blind, deaf and dumb.

"I figured Katniss and Gale were the tributes Plutarch was looking for but he didn't want Gale after all. Gale's fire would draw the women, but not the men, Plutarch said. Gale would be a rebel soldier anyway, he was already headed in that direction. I didn't really understand what Plutarch wanted in his male tribute, but eventually I stumbled upon a Town kid, good looking and likable, strong and capable but with a different set of skills than Katniss had, and already in love with her: the baker's kid. I've been in the bakery while Peeta waited affably on women and girls and seemed a perfect gentleman. I've been in the bakery when Katniss was there and Peeta almost froze hisself into a loaf of bread.

"So Peeta Mellark and Katniss Everdeen were set to be the tributes from District 12.

"That year there were two sets of reaping balls. The Capitol's set had a couple thousand names and Gale's name 42 times, Katniss's name 20 times, Madge's name 4 times and Prim's name once. Our set had thousands of pieces of paper with (I assumed) Katniss's name in the girl's ball and Peeta's name in the boy's ball. I switched the Capitol's reaping balls with our reaping balls before Effie arrived. I hugged Effie on the stage so she would be in no state to notice anything odd, and I fell off the stage to get the cameras off the balls and so that I'd be back in the Justice Building to take charge of both sets of Reaping Balls before anyone could discover what we'd done. That was the one act I performed for the rebellion that required bravery, not so much because I was afraid I'd get caught, but because it was a pretty a rotten thing to do to Katniss and Peeta. But ever body sacrifices in a war, says Plutarch.

"Now, I have to say that I did not believe that Plutarch could pull his big idea off. I didn't believe that specially selecting the tributes for one district could have any effect on the outcome of the Games. When the ceremony got underway I assumed Effie Trinket would hollar out "Katniss Everdeen!" Instead she called Prim's name. I was surprised when she called Prim, but not when Katniss volunteered to take her sister's place. And then I was surprised by the crowd. They made no sound when Effie asked for a big round of applause. Instead they silently gave Katniss District 12's traditional gesture of respect, an act of rebellion itself. That was when I started to believe that whatever Plutarch was planning might actually happen.

_Peeta stays calm and thoughtful when his name is called at the Reaping: _

I'm stunned when I hear my name called out by Effie Trinket and realize that I'm going to the Games. I don't fear death, really, death is probably like just another day in District 12. I haven't known much pain in my life, unless you count the pain of loving Katniss Everdeen without having the guts to try to talk to her. I don't imagine physical pain could be that much worse than the stab I feel when I catch her eye at school and let my gaze drift away, for the 1000th time, and I go through that a couple of times a week.

I realize that I'm not much concerned with staying alive. I manage to enjoy myself day-to-day in school, in the bakery, with my friends when there's time. But no one depends on me and I haven't got that much to look forward to in the future. The bakery probably won't support both my brothers and me too, especially if one or more of us gets married and has kids. These thoughts pass by in a flash and then I'm shaking hands with Katniss and her hand feels electric crossing my palm. I notice her startled glance at me and then we're hustled off stage to separate rooms, for goodbyes.

My mother pops in for a moment, says something unpleasant and leaves. My brothers and my father are more affected by my predicament. We never paid more attention to the Games than is absolutely necessary, and we never talked about what if one of us was reaped. Both my brothers remind of my wrestling skills, that's got to be useful, they say. We joke about a baker at the Games, then my brothers say they'll miss me and bow out before it gets too emotional. My dad stays a few minutes longer, not saying much. Just as he gets up to go he looks me in the eye and says "Maybe some good will come of this, son. You never know." I know his story with Katniss's mother, and he knows mine with Katniss. Hopeless romantics, me and my Dad.

My gang of friends are waiting when my dad leaves. They are most of them upset and pretty much at loss for something to say. "Shit, man . . ." is about the most eloquent contribution, but I appreciate being in a crowd of friends one last time. Then they're ushered out, whether they like it or not, and I'm hustled to the car with Katniss.

_For everyone but the Everdeens, Hawthornes, and Mellarks it's a holiday now._

Katniss is correct that in the Seam after the Reaping most houses are cheerfully lit, windows flung open, with laughing and cheerful voices cutting through the drone of the old TV's playing the reapings of the other 11 Districts. The residents are required to watch; generally the adults of each house take it in turns to watch for Peacekeepers, and if one shows up they all quiet down and swivel to the TV.

The bakery can't afford to close on the night of a celebration, but only the mother is working behind the counter. She is so tough she can sell bread and cake and cookies the night her son was taken away to die, yet no one would dare to offer a word of sympathy. A word of sympathy might have done her good, but she had cultivated her tough exterior until no one (even she) knew there was a mother underneath. Such were the cruelties of Panem that a woman could bury her real personality under the armor she required to keep herself going.

The Everdeen's house is quiet.

Prim sits sobbing in her mother's lap, her head on her mother's shoulder. Her mother has already spread a diaper over her shoulder so that Prim's face wouldn't chafe against the tears she'd already shed, and she holds another in one hand to mop the new tears as they well up.

"I heard my name and I thought 'Katniss, help me!'"

"Of course you did, dear, Katniss was always ready to help you."

"But I didn't realize that this time if she helped me she would have to go."

"But Katniss understood that, Prim, and she would have volunteered even if you had not thought of it. She wanted to save you from the Games. Even if you had not wanted her to, she would have done it."

The tears that Ahngora, Katniss's mother, held back for Prim's sake threatened to spill over, but Prim is a healer too and she knows her mother suffers.

"Tell me, Mamma. If you tell me why you cry you'll feel better."

"Now Katniss may never know how much I love her."

"She doesn't know? How can she not know?"

"You will be a healer when you get older, like me, but Katniss takes after her father more than she does me. She didn't understand how I could be so sick when your father was killed. She was frightened and later she was angry with me."

"But you couldn't help being sick."

"Nobody knows what makes people get sick in that way. We cannot be sure I could not stop it. But you must help me stay well for you."

"What can I do Mamma?"

"Make sure I take my medicine. Help me make of list of things to do while you are at school every day. And we must walk in the sunshine every chance we get. Sunshine is good for your mind."

"Katniss used to say she felt happier when the sun was shining even though there was nothing to be happy about."

"We must not get used to thinking of her in the past. She is still alive, and she is well trained for a wilderness life. She may come home."

"Oh, Mamma, do you think so?"

"I must not think so, or I will be too disappointed if she does not. But I will hope so, with all my heart, and so must you, Prim. She will feel our love and our confidence in the Arena and it will help her sometimes. The more we think about her, the better."

Prim begins to sob again. "Wouldn't it be better if I had gone? You can spare me more easily."

"I can't spare either of you, Prim. Katniss couldn't spare you either. She loves you more than anybody else. And though Katniss feeds our bodies, you feed our hearts. A heart is nothing without its body and a body is nothing without its heart. You are both necessary to us."

"But you must be wrong to say Katniss doesn't know you love her. I can't believe she doesn't know that."

"She was very scared when your father died and I couldn't take care of you. When she began to hunt and we all started to get better again she was angry at me because she had been so frightened. She is still angry, but she is young, and there is so much to learn about love. You will always love easily, but for Katniss it is harder. She doesn't trust other people with her heart."

"I don't know what you mean."

"Perhaps in a few years you will."

Prim and Ahngora spend the night talking and crying and sometimes laughing as well when a funny memory intrudes. After milking her goat and trying to eat breakfast Prim sets off to school, still in her dress from the Reaping Day. The next day when Ahngora and Prim watch the opening ceremonies they are astonished by a new Katniss they have never seen before: the Girl on Fire.

_Peeta asks to see Haymitch alone on the day before the interviews._

"A'right kid, you got me alone now. What is it you cain't say in front of Katniss?"

"I'm in love with her."

"No kidding!"

"Can you tell? I mean, can anyone tell just by looking?"

"Naw. But I know you from home and I seen you freeze up when she comes in the bakery. But I ain't surprised when a man's gotta crush on her. She comes into the Hob, jest about ever body perks up. They all like her. And she don't notice nuthin. She's clueless."

"If I'm going to die in the Arena, I want her to know. And let's face it, I probably will die in the Arena, I'm not exactly Games material. I don't even want to _be_ Games material. But I'd be happier if I knew that she knows that all these years I've loved her as much as a boy can love a girl."

"How many years you talkin' 'bout?"

"Since I was in first grade."

"Sounds like you got a story to tell. So tell it."

Peeta stares out the window so he doesn't have to see Haymitch's face and tells Haymitch about himself and Katniss, his father and Katniss' mother. He tells Haymitch how the birds stopped to listen when Katniss sang on the first day of school. Peeta even tells Haymitch about the bread, the one interaction with Katniss in the eleven years since Peeta first saw her. Haymitch listens thoughtfully, and stays silent and thoughtful when Peeta finishes. Peeta's eyes remain on the window, but he's no longer seeing the view, he's seeing the girl with two braids and a red plaid dress standing on a stool and singing while the kids and the birds listen.

Haymitch finally speaks, "Well, kid, I respect your feelings and that, but the thing is – you can use this to your advantage in the Arena so now since I'm your mentor, I gotta tell you how. 'Cause this kind of thing will bring in the sponsors. And the sponsors are your best friends when you need a good meal or you really belong in the hospital."

"I'd rather use it to Katniss's advantage."

"You got a death wish?"

"No, I'd really rather live happily ever after with her when this is all over."

"Well, think of that as your goal. Don't question me on that, just accept it. And **don't** tell **no**body I said that to you. NO body, you hear? **No**body."

"Wow."

"It don't really matter how much you prepare for the games, or how much of the good stuff you get out of the Cornucopia, or how big and strong you are, there are a couple a things you cain't do much to control. One is what audience thinks of you, one is the brains behind the Games, and the last one is pure luck. You got no control over luck. But you gotta believe you might be lucky. You, not that blond bruiser from Distrist 2 or the oversized ox from 11. You, Peeta from District 12, you might get lucky."

"So, no thinking I can't hack it."

"Right. And with this here story you got 'n opportunity."

"So what do I with it?"

"You musta had something in your mind about the interview, right?

"Right, I was wondering if I could tell it in my interview, how I feel about her."

"Sure you can. Caesar loves to talk about stuff like that. Give him half a chance and he'll be asking all about your girl. You wanna practice it, me quizzing you?"

"No, I'm ok now that I've said it out loud. I could do it again."

"So, BUT, there a couple of things you gotta know about Katniss. You notice how the first thing she asked me about was a strategy thing? She's gonna think this love story is _your _strategy. Then when you finally get her alone she's gonna be hard to convince that this is for real and not something you cooked up with me this morning to gain sympathy from the spectators."

"Um, I'm not sure I understand that."

"See, some tributes use strategies to trick other tributes or influence the audience. Couple years ago a tribute pretended she was scared of ever thing, in the training and when they got to the arena. After the bloodbath was over, turned out she was faking. She was a killer, that girl. And she won. So that's a strategy."

"How can me loving Katniss be a strategy?"

"It'll make the audience feel for you so you get some sponsors. Could be you want to show a weak side so the other tributes don't expect a fierce competitor. Lotsa ways you could spin it."

"But I'm sincere."

"I know you are, kid, I don't doubt you. But Katniss will and the other tributes will. You don't care what the other tributes think. But here's another thing about Katniss. That boy she hunts with – he's in love with her too, and she gots no idea. Not a clue. Don't know how that could be, but so it is."

"How do you know Gale's in love with Katniss?"

"I see 'em together practically ever day in the Hob, trading and such. All the guys in there try to flirt with her. She don't notice it, but that boy she hunts with does. He don't like it much, other guys flirting with her."

"So I've got a rival?"

"I wouldn't worry about that so much as I would to get her convinced you're telling the truth, period. See what you got here is real life that is also good Games strategy. She'll have to sort out what's strategy and what's real, and you want to help her with that."

"This is so confusing."

"Naw, it ain't confusing. Love is real simple; if you feel it you should tell her, 'cause you might not have another chance. But you gotta look at it from her side. These here are the Games and nobody trusts nobody at the Games. So she might not believe it at first. She might be hard to convince. Ain't so different from real life actually. They don't always know when you're sincere or just flirting."

"Should I try to team up with her?"

"Naw. If I was you I'd try to do something for her first. They don't usually have bow 'n arrows at the Games 'cause most cain't use 'em. But I betcha they have a real fine one for her after her shot at the Gamesmakers. Only I don't want her at the bloodbath. So you figger out how to get that weapon yourself, then you team up."

_Peeta can't sleep the night before the tributes are taken to the Arena and he hopes writing his thoughts down will calm his spinning head. _

I can't sleep and my Hovercraft will come to take me to the arena in just a few hours. I wonder if anyone will ever read this. Maybe they'll send it home with my clothes and stuff, and my mother will probably just throw it out.

Like I told Katniss, I don't think I'm a real contender in these Games. I have no survival skills, I don't like fighting, and the whole thing just – ugh – . But I'm not sorry I was reaped, not really. And because I was reaped I got to tell Katniss (and the rest of Panem) that I love her.

What I was fretting about up on the roof just now, that I don't want to die as just another piece in the Capitol's Game – I just realized that I've already taken care of that! Sure, they're using me as a pawn in their game of revenge and fear. But I used them too! I used Caesar Flickerman to get the message to Katniss that I love her. A lot of boys like her, but I love her. With that secret off my chest I'm more myself than I've even been. Too bad I didn't think of that until _after_ Katniss left in a huff, though it might not have made any difference. For one thing, I don't think she believes me that I love her. She's practically oblivious to anyone's feelings about her, according to Haymitch. And my philosophical musing on the roof irritated her survival instincts, which were already turned to MAX.

I'm glad Haymitch and Cinna and Portia made us be friendly with each other during the training days. I understand that the Katniss I love is partly a romantic ideal but some of the things I love in her are definitely real. I love that birds listen when she sings. I love that she keeps her family alive with rabbits and squirrels and food from the meadow. I love that she strolls daily through the Hob, a place I'm afraid to visit. I love the look of her: her thick dark hair I want to lose myself in, wide grey eyes that always seem focused on something behind me, her slender, graceful figure as she stalks through the school. I love her enigmatic quiet and her penchant for solitude. Now I have a few more notes on her character. My dad was right, something good has come of this.

I've just had an idea. Those landmines we've been warned about, the ones that detonate if we step off the circles that bring us up to the arena: I wonder if those could be salvaged and rearmed. As Katniss hikes away to find water I could get one of the District 3 tributes to talk about rearming them. We could join the careers with a weapon like that. I figure the careers will concentrate on Thresh and Katniss, so if I'm working with them I could spread some disinformation about Katniss, then maybe escape them and be Katniss's ally.

Well, my mind's clear now so I guess I'm ready for the Games, as ready as I'll ever be . . .


	2. The Games Begin

_In the Seam_

Gale and his family watch the Games ceremonies on their TV the night before the tributes enter the arena. They have seen Katniss transformed to the smiling Girl on Fire, blowing kisses with one hand, clutching Peeta's hand with the other, and wondered what else has changed within her. Tonight she's transformed again, glowing like the embers of a fire. Gale and his mother are both staggered by Katniss's beauty, and Gale has also to conceal his rising desire for this Girl on Fire. His face grows hot and his ears ring as he watches the exotic beauty who was Katniss, his own girl and hunting partner only six days ago.

Like any 17-year-old boy Gale doesn't want his feelings to be obvious to everyone, but he knows that his mother is aware of his love for Katniss and that she approves. A week ago Hazelle was looking forward to the eventual wedding of Gale and Katniss as more than just a wedding; Gale's marriage to Katniss would unite and perhaps finally heal two families shattered by the loss of their fathers and husbands.

Hazelle also knows that Katniss does not share Gale's feelings yet. Katniss is young for her age in many ways, having become head of her family so early. Hazelle assumes Katniss's worries about feeding her family crowd out thoughts of boys and love and flirting and her eventual marriage. Nevertheless Hazelle has always assumed Katniss would eventually chose Gale because he is her best friend and the only young man in a position to gain her trust. Now all Hazelle's hopes and wishes mean nothing unless Katniss returns from the Games alive. Even then everything would change in ways Hazelle cannot foresee.

Katniss's three-minute interview is too short for Gale and Hazelle, though all the other interviews seemed long. Gale is surprised by Katniss' frivolity and banter with the audience and the Gamesmakers. As she spins he knows he'll dream of catching her spinning, fumbling with the jeweled dress to uncover this new and beautiful Katniss and satisfy his hunger for her. His musing is interrupted by Peeta's interview, which he tunes in to just in time to hear Peeta's declaration of love. He sees Katniss blush, her face turned from the cameras in her confusion. He sees no sign that she is pleased by Peeta's feelings, but he is angered nonetheless, that he is so far away and cannot plead his own cause before Katniss's thoughts turn from him and the home he wants to make with her.

Gales has to get out of the house into the dark night. He rises abruptly and leaves the house, slamming the door behind him. He stalks through the quiet streets, carefully avoiding Peacekeepers, thinking and fuming and unwillingly captured by a fierce desire for the glowing Girl on Fire.

_At the Mentors' headquarters_

As the circles bring tributes up into the arena Haymitch leans forward, eagerly this year, to watch the first moves of his two protégées. He is torn between hoping they'll follow his advice and hoping they'll think for themselves. Both will be necessary to make it home alive and only the outcome will show when it's best to do one or the other. The gong sounds and the other mentors begin cheering and hollering in support of their own tributes but Haymitch keeps his thoughts to himself:

"What the – ? What's she doing . . . OK, she wants the silver bow and arrows . . . so she's got a pack and a knife. Get outa there! Git! OK, she's away. Go find water like I told you to. Good luck sweetheart.

"What the – ? What's _he_ doing? This looks dangerous. This looks stupid, he's gonna get hisself killed. Wait, wait, they're _talking?_ OK – well, now that was a good move against Clover! Very smooth. Didn't know he was that gooda wrassler. What the – ? What are they, having a _meeting?_ That's got to be a Hunger Games first . . .

"Well, ain't that a bite in the ass. He's joined the careers. The boy who's in love with Katniss has joined her enemies. Let's hope he's got a strategy, 'cause I cain't figger out what he's up to."

Haymitch is cares more for both of his tributes than he will show. But only one can win, and between Katniss and Peeta, his money is on Katniss. She has the skills, she will be hard to catch, and when she gets hold of those bow and arrows, which he has no doubt she will do, she can be as lethal as Cato as long as she can be ruthless enough. And Haymitch thinks the girl who could lose her temper with the Gameskeepers will probably be plenty ruthless enough.

In the meantime, he keeps an eye on Peeta, trying to discern the method in his madness.

_Peeta's first moves in the Games_

As Katniss disappears into the woods Peeta turns his attention to the Cornucopia. The three career boys turn on Thresh immediately and fight what looks like a losing battle. The area around them is scattered with knifes, a spear and an axe; Thresh has disarmed his attackers and they are fighting hand-to-hand. One boy is doubled over and retching, another is struggling to stand, and a third is trying to protect his head from Thresh's blows. All four are bloody and bruised and beat up.

The girls from the career districts arm themselves straightaway and attack all tributes who approach the cornucopia. The career girls are fighting more successfully than the boys, three well-trained and well-armed girls against eleven tributes with no experience in fighting, most of them preoccupied by trying to find a weapon or supplies in the cornucopia. Most of them look to Peeta like they should have run for the woods as Haymitch had advised him to do.

Peeta walks around to the boy from District 3, who is still standing indecisively on his circle. He describes his idea for the land-mines to the guy, whose name is Anto. They each dig up a land-mine. Anto recognizes them from the factory he works in and tells Peeta that even a tiny weight within 3 inches of the mine will set it off, and the blast radius is about 18 inches. He starts to rearm it while Peeta keeps an eye on the fighting.

Thresh has one tribute on the ground with his foot on the boy's throat. He raises his foot and stamps so hard that Peeta can hear the crack and crunch of breaking bones. Before the other two boys can react Thresh turns and sprints into the tall grass across from the woodlands and disappears. Cato and the boy from District 1 collapse, gasping and bleeding and spent.

Two career girls turn their attention to Peeta and Anto, the last two tributes standing uninjured. Clove runs at Peeta with a knife in each hand, but Peeta is the "takedown artist" in the wrestling club in District 12 and though Clove thinks he is completely unprepared, in fact he's ready for her. In a burst of street-fighting countered by wrestling moves Clove manages to slash Peeta's arm before he throws her face down on the ground with his knee on her back. Glimmer stalks up to Anto while trying to fit an arrow onto the silver bow. She sneers at him "Do you want to be my target practice for this thing?" Peeta answers for him, "He's rearmed that landmine he's holding. _If_ you hit him you'll probably die in the blast."

Glimmer and Clove are good at fighting, not so good at thinking. Both girls are beautiful, strong and cruel, but neither is very bright. Glimmer yells to the other career tributes "Cato! Marvel! Come over here!"

Peeta calls out as they approach, "District 3 rearmed the landmine under his circle. He's armed with that landmine so walk carefully. Listen, we have a proposal for you. If you don't like the proposal, we can fight after we talk."

"You're bluffing."

"Am I?"

"Let go of Clove."

"If she tosses the knives away."

They all stand in silence until Cato says " Throw 'em, Clove." She hesitates for a few seconds before she tosses them and Peeta steps back a pace to let her scramble to her feet.

"So what's this proposal?"

Peeta gestured to Anto, the boy from District 3. "He can rearm these things. We could take all the weapons and supplies from the cornucopia and use these mines to booby-trap the stuff so no other tribute could get at it – or if they try, they die. Or we could mine the field where Thresh is. Anyway, we'll give you 12 armed mines if we join your alliance."

Marvel turned to Peeta. "Why you, what have you got, loverboy?"

"It was my idea."

"What else?"

"You lost your guy from District 4."

"So?"

"I'm about the same size and weight."

"How about you show us where your girlfriend is?"

"I know the kind of places she will probably hang out in, but I don't know any more about the arena than you do."

"So – what? – were you scamming everybody with that love story?"

'No, just answering the questions. Truthfully."

"So why would you help us find her?"

Peeta shrugs. "Self-defense I guess. I suppose she'd kill me if she had to, she's not in love with me. And I certainly don't want to be the one to kill her."

"How did she get that 11?"

"I think she threw something at the Gamesmakers. I heard our mentor say something about spunk counts as much as skill."

Cato says "yeah, right" sarcastically and stands for a moment, glaring belligerently at Peeta. Peeta holds his gaze without expression until Cato says "We won't protect you or your buddy. You get all that stuff out of the Cornucopia and set the traps around it AND stay around to fetch stuff for us so we don't risk the mines, then yeah, we won't kill you." He smirks and winks at the girls. "Yet. Anto stays with the supplies and you hunt with us, Loverboy."

Peeto just nods curtly. Without talking he and Anto dig up the remaining mines while the career tributes sort through supplies for food and first aid kits. The careers relax and eat and bandage each other as Peeta and Anto get to work. Anto collects the landmines and a few tools from the Cornucopia and laboriously rearms the mines about 30 feet from the others. Peeta walks to and fro bringing supplies and equipment from the Cornucopia. As he fetches and carries he sorts through the supplies and chooses two sheathed knives and the best medical kit for his belt, and stuffs matches and packets of food in his pockets. Whenever he's out of sight from other tributes he studies items in the medical kit and is amazed to find tiny injections of antibiotics and anti-tracker jacker venom, pills to take if you have to drink the water untreated, something called advanced wound care, as well as aspirin and antiseptic rinse and bandages. After mastering the usage instructions he stows the most valuable items in his pockets under food and matches.

Then he and Anto carefully place and mark the mines while the careers drowse in the sun. Cato wakes as the day cools into evening and hustles the others awake and ready to hunt down the tributes who got away.

Anto stays with the booby-trapped supplies. He saved one landmine for himself, which he can use as a grenade, and thanks to Peeta's great idea he now hopes to simply outlast all the others.

Peeta is pleased with the success of his plan. The careers have placed themselves in a vulnerable position and don't realize it: without him or Anto they will have to risk themselves to get their supplies and they don't realize how sensitive the landmines are. Peeta doesn't expect the careers to put up with him very long. He intends to escape them as soon as he can, preferably with the bow and arrow Glimmer now carries. If he can take the bow and arrow to Katniss, he hopes she will team up with him.

As they arm themselves for the hunt, Cato quizzes Peeta about Katniss.

Cato insists "You must know how she got that 11."

"No, I don't. Did you guys tell each other what you did for the private session?"

"Weren't you coached together? Her and you ate lunch together, like you was love buddies."

"Yeah, our mentor wanted us to do that. He wouldn't tell us why. From the training I don't know any more about her than you guys do."

Glimmer said "Well, I saw her throw a spear. She was pathetic."

"What does she do in your District?"

"I don't hang out with her at school, nobody does. She's a loner."

"Don't kids work in your District?"

"The town kids do. She's from the mining families, and they don't work until they are 18, when they go into the mines. Well, the boys are miners. I don't know what girls do."

The careers' tempers don't improve as they hunt though the woods without finding even a trace of the other tributes. They have no way of knowing that three of the girls are clustered near Katniss. Rue, Foxface and the girl from District 8 all have the same plan, to follow Katniss wherever she goes for a few days, in the hope of teaming with her or otherwise learning from her. The boy from District 10 went from the cornucopia into the woods near the grass, where he thought he could best hide. Katniss, Rue and Foxface are all in trees; while Katniss sleeps, Rue and Foxface shiver and thirst. The freezing girl from District 8 gives in and lights a fire around 3:00, which draws the hunters straight to her. Wood smoke is a powerful scent and the hunters are drawn to it before they even realize they smell it.

During the hunt Cato and Marvel spell it out for Peeta: he will kill their first victim that night, even if it's Katniss, or they will kill him. Peeta had guessed this would happen, and is sure that they won't find Katniss. He says with sufficient nonchalance, "I've killed before," which is true in a way. At home his dad and brothers and he butcher their own livestock, so he has killed chickens and pigs and knows to aim for the big blood vessels in the neck.

When they creep up on the girl from District 8 asleep over her fire, Clove and Glimmer wake her as Peeta steps behind her, just for the fun of watching her die aware that she being killed, and for the fun of watching Peeta kill, aware that his victim is aware he is killing her. Peeta had foreseen this as well, and gets through the ordeal without cracking. As they move on and no cannon fires, he returns to the girl, knowing she's no longer conscious and will die soon when enough blood has drained from her body. He holds her hand till the cannon booms then leaves with her small pack.

Peeta's anger at the Games bubbles up. He hates himself for having killed that girl and yet it was kill or be killed in an utterly artificial situation. But he has to be cool in front of Cato and the career pack.

The next day, as Katniss and her shadows march farther and farther away from the lake in search of water, the careers and Peeta alternately hunt and rest, hunt and rest. The careers do not think of trees as hiding places, and Peeta doesn't know Katniss climbs trees. It's not until after the fire, when they actually see Katniss scramble up a tree, that the careers and Peeta realize they've been overlooking an important part of the arena.

Cato and the career girls are infuriated by Katniss's verbal and physical victory over them but Marvel calms them down. "We'll get her in the morning. We'll set fire to the tree, chop it down, whatever it takes. Relax!" Peeta says nothing. All night his mind goes round and round and he can't think of anything at all but what a mess he's got himself into.

In the morning he's awake, so he's the first to see and hear the tracker jacker nest tumbling down, and he instinctively runs. When he hears Clove and Cato and Marvel behind him yelling "to the lake" he realizes that he's running from tracker jackers and reaches for his anti-tracker jacker venom injector. As soon as a tracker jacker stings him, he jams the tiny needle into his thigh and trips (on purpose) so as to hide the small instrument. He picks up a few more stings on the way to the lake, and they swell and hurt locally, but his mind remains clear.

Cato and Clove beat him to the lake, they are submerged to the neck when Peeta reaches the end of the woods. Peeta's got five stings, but the tracker jackers are gone now, and with Cato in the lake and under the influence this might be his chance to grab the bow and arrow and break away from the careers. He reverses direction so fast he doesn't see Cato come after him, but he hears a splash from the lake and the roar of Cato's temper. As Cato sees it, Peeta's "girlfriend" Katniss made Cato look a fool twice and she bested him in battle as well. Peeta's going to pay for that. Peeta has the advantage of speed on the way back to the tracker jacker nest, since the venom isn't messing up his head, and he hears Cato crashing and blundering slowly behind him. But when Peeta reaches the tracker jacker tree he finds Katniss still there, struggling to string an arrow. She has several tracker jacker stings and she's already hallucinating.

"What are you still doing here?" Peeta hisses. "Are you mad? Get up! Get up!" He prods Katniss to stand with the shaft of a spear and shoves her with all his strength. "Run!" he screams, "Run!" Behind him Cato slashes his way through the brush. He's badly stung under one eye, and in other places as well, but a big body can withstand more venom than a smaller one and Cato isn't hallucinating as badly as Katniss yet. Katniss flees too quickly for Cato to follow, so Cato focuses on Peeta again. He slashes his sword fiercely, almost too fast for Peeta to keep out of range, and too fast for Peeta to see behind himself to pick a path to safety. Peeta's back slams against a tree as Cato's sword tip cuts him viciously across the upper thigh and both fall to the ground. Cato is totally under the influence of tracker jacker venom now, while Peeta is savagely wounded.

With Cato fully delusional from the venom, Peeta is free to take care of himself and his injury. He douses the wound with the antiseptic rinse and applies the pressure bandage right over his pants, like it says in the directions. He does a limping, lurching crab-walk to get away from Cato's moaning and shouting.

He is not far from the lake but he can't make it there and back and put enough distance between himself and his new enemies. While Clove, Cato and Marvel are out of their minds on tracker jacker venom, Peeta has maybe two days to crawl far enough away that they won't find him. He has four tiny shots of antibiotics. He'll have to depend on what Glimmer and the girl from District 4 had in their packs for food, water and warmth. He inches over to their camping site and rifles through the stuff they left behind. There are two sleeping bags on the ground and a water bottle they'd been sharing, but the packs contain mostly weapons and only small packets of snack foods. Peeta will be hungry but he will be warm. His most important task now is to get away from here, and find a place with water where he can rest until his luck turns one way or the other.


	3. The Rule Change

_At the Games Headquarters _

Haymitch slowly sits back in his chair watching the action on his pair of TVs. On one screen he sees Katniss clutching the silver bow and arrow and slowly descending into the madness of a tracker jacker trip. On the other screen Peeta clumsily treats his wound, jabs himself with an antibiotic injection and tries to stand up. After several painful attempts Peeta realizes he can't stand so he drags himself back to the camp and begins to search the remaining gear.

Cato's mentor is jeering at Peeta. Glimmer's mentor and the girl's mentor from District 4 are quietly packing up their stuff to leave, while Haymitch sits lost in thought: "So the boy really does love her. He just saved her life. Might be his end, might not. He's got that industrial-strength medical kit, I'm sure glad he's the one that found it. That was good strategy he used to get the pick of the supplies. Give him credit for that. Uh-oh, here comes Foxface."

_In the Arena_

Peeta pulls a knife from its sheath as Foxface approaches.

"Relax, Peeta, I've got no weapons, I just want to make a trade."

"What do you want? And what have you got?"

"I want one of those sleeping bags. I'll help you pack up and go to the creek if you'll give me one of those sleeping bags. I'll stay with you till the venom starts to wear off these crazy guys. What are you doing with them anyway?"

"I wanted the bow and arrow for Katniss."

"Your work is done; she has it now."

For the next two days Foxface helps Peeta inch towards the creek, crab-crawling on his back, limping with a crutch Foxface found or crawling on his hands and one good knee. Peeta is too breathless from his efforts to talk, and Foxface says little; she never even volunteers her name. They make slow but steady progress, speedier in the couple of hours after each day's antibiotic injection, when Peeta has the most strength. On the seventh day of the games Foxface, who hears like a fox as well as looks like one, senses Cato is awake and roaring, and she abandons Peeta so fast he doesn't have a chance to thank her. She takes the gear she was hauling, but Peeta still has his crutch and a pack with a sleeping bag, some snacks and his medical kit. He has no water bottle, but he'll be by the creek.

There's no trail in the camp to lead Cato to him, thanks to Foxface, who brushed away the trail as they moved. Peeta has no way of knowing whether Cato knows he's alive, but if Cato remembers the fight and he should know Peeta is no threat to him now. Even so, if Cato is up, Peeta better get in hiding quickly if he can. The creek is pretty close, or so said Foxface. He gives himself his last antibiotic shot and sets himself the task of moving till he finds the creek. He hobbles and crawls, hobbles and crawls, until he can smell water ahead and knows he's nearly there. The pressure bandage is increasingly uncomfortable and he has a dim memory from the directions in the kit that he wasn't supposed to leave it on so long. He removes it to find that the wound hasn't healed at all. Had Peeta used the bandage as it was meant to be used, it would have kept his leg from bleeding until Peeta got to a medic. Of course, there is no medic at the Hunger Games. Peeta is a little panicky now, he'd _thought_ the wound would improve while it was bandaged and he was taking antibiotics. He'd had a vague plan of finding a cave or something . . . and . . . he realizes he never had any idea what to do next. But he hears something behind him so he moves in a rush to the stream using the huge rocks to steady himself till he reaches the water and squirms under the shelter of an overhanging rock. Whatever it was behind him paid no attention to him, so he waits till he's calm again and takes stock of his situation.

_At the Games Headquarters _

"Just _think_ Seneca, we've _never_ _**had**_ a love story be_fore_. It _could_ _**be**_ the most _pop_ular games in _**his**_tory. It could be your _legacy_ to Panem. It's the chance of a _life_time. No one will _ever_ devise such a _brilliant_ Games _ever_ again." Plutarch is trying to persuade Seneca Crane, the Gamesmaker, how a love story would enhance these games. Plutarch is thinking solely of Katniss and Peeta, but Seneca needn't know that.

"We've only _got_ one pair of lovebirds? Right now _he'_s barely alive and _she's_ ignoring **him**."

"We've got _**two**_ pair Seneca, didn't you _see_ Cato and Clove at it last night?"

"At **what**?"

"At **what**? They were _doin' it_, that's **what?**"

"_It_? What _it_? What are you _**on**__ about_?"

"The S_**EX**_ Seneca, did you _not_ see the S_**EX**_?"

"Sssh! _Everybody_ will hear you?"

"What _difference_ does that make? Everyone _saw it _last night."

"_**I**_ _didn't_?"

"We edited _most_ _of it_ out of the national feed but it was coming out of Camera 140 and I really can't believe you didn't _see it_."

Seneca gives a thoroughly naughty giggle and winks at Plutarch. "I _did_ see it this morning, **Penta** was so kind as to _save_ it for me? But I _really_ **don't** understand this i_de_a of yours, Plutarch, of a love story? There's only _one_ victor in the Games, but we would need **two** for a love story?"

"We could _change the rules_ this year to _allow_ **a pair** to win, if they're in love."

"_If_ they're in love? And how are we to judge _that_? Use camera 140?"

"Well, look what the **boy** from District 12 did for the **girl** from 12. He saved her life, he helped her get the bow and arrow. I _believe him_ now that he loves her. I _totally_ believe him."

"But she's _**ignoring**_ him?"

"She wouldn't ignore him if she knew she could win if she were **TOGETHER** with him."

"What about the two _sex maniacs_? Do you think they are in love?"

"In their own way I suppose they may be?"

"We _couldn't_ let two win because of being in **love**, it's _too_ sub_jec_tive. The criteria would have to be something _absolute_, like being from the same district."

"That's **IT**, Seneca, that's brilliant. We have several pairs left. Mutt and Jeff from 11, the two kids on fire from 12 and the sexy pair from 2!"

"Mutt and _what_?"

'Oh Seneca, I _wish_ you knew some hi_story_ – **Mutt** and **Jeff** were literary characters in history, before Panem. **Mutt** was a name – they didn't have muttations back then. But, _back_ to what I was saying, after 74 years the Games are really getting _a bit samey_. We don't notice _sooooo much_ because we have the **arena** to plan, the **weather** and the **mutts** and the various **dangers** to control. But the people who watch them see pretty much the same thing year after year. Wouldn't it be nice to have something _**new**_? And a love story could last a long time – the engagement, the wedding, even some kids!"

"Yes, it would be a _nice __**idea**_ but I can't imagine President Snow **allowing** it?"

"Well, we won't say anything about it until we announce to the Arena. Then as the games grow in **pop**_ularity_ he'll see what a _good idea_ it is, and he'll pretend it was **his** idea. That's what always happens. But he'll remember it was you _who_ came **up** with the idea next TIME he has some favor to **_be_**stow."

"But it's _your_ idea."

"No, I thought of couples _in love_. You thought of couples from the **same district**."

"Yes, that's **true**? Well, let's _talk it over_ some more** later**. Now that _everybody's_ coming out of the tracker jacker hallucinations I need to brew some _trouble_ for those tributes at the lake. They're **too** comfortable for _my taste_? Now don't mention this to **any**body. We don't want **anyone** to take the _credit_!

Persuading Seneca to change a rule in the Games is possibly Plutarch's most dangerous move in his rebel campaign to use the Games against the Capitol. His goal for these Games depends on both Katniss and Peeta coming home alive, with Katniss having performed some act of rebellion while in the arena. The love story between Katniss and Peeta must captivate Panem – so little of the official news they receive has any charm or pleasure to it. Katniss must save Peeta – Plutarch won't have to contrive that, with Peeta in the shape he's in.

But Plutarch's hardest task is to convince Seneca that he himself conceived the idea to change the rules so that two tributes can win, and he must contrive to have Seneca announce the rule change soon. Plutarch knows that Seneca will pay for the rule change with his life, and that's also necessary to his plans. Plutarch must be the Gamesmaker next year during the Quarter Quell. Plutarch is so pleased that Seneca urged him to keep quiet about the rule change that he feels he's accomplished enough for the moment. He retreats to his own office where he has six TV screens so he can watch a good cross section of the Games. He watches Katniss and Rue form their alliance, Peeta settle into his sleeping bag for the night, snakelike muttations chase all the careers away from their stash of supplies until Anto throws his grenade into the writhing mass, and Thresh prepare his evening meal in front of the fort he built for his defense.

_In the Seam_

Ahngora and Prim find watching the Hunger Games almost unbearable but they are required to watch. The Peacekeepers make their rounds day and night to make sure the citizens are watching as required. Darius manages to get himself assigned to the street where the Everdeens live, and he drops by every now and again to reassure the two Everdeens how well Katniss is doing, how the betting favors her, how impressed the neighbors and the Peacekeepers are by her hunting and survival skills. He guesses how much the violence of the games bothers the healer and her young daughter and he suggests they have sewing or knitting projects to work on so they can look at something besides the TV screen. "Nobody's ever been busted for working and watching the TV at the same time," he says, with a wink and a grin. Neither Ahngora nor Prim know Darius, or know how he knows Katniss, but they can feel his affection and respect for her when he speaks of her, so they trust him. The Games are a little more bearable once Katniss has the silver bow and arrow and Ahngora and Prim each have some mending to work on.

The time while Katniss and the careers are tripping on tracker jacker venom is pretty slow. None of the aggressors is able to fight: Thresh, Foxface, Anto, the boy from District 10 and Rue are all playing a defensive game.

Gale watches the Games grimly. At first it seems that Peeta is betraying Katniss, then she captures the silver bow and arrow and Peeta saves her life, possibly at the expense of his own. Gale can't doubt Peeta's love after watching his fight with Cato and his painful two-day journey to the creek. Peeta's prospects don't look good though, and Gale manages to put Peeta out of his mind and concentrate on Katniss's successes until Rue is trapped.

Listening to her sing _Here is the place I love you_ and watching her decorate Rue in violet, yellow and white flowers brings tears to his eyes, while his mother and sister sob, and in that moment he misses her acutely. It's been two weeks since he's seen Katniss, the longest separation they've endured since they began hunting as a team.

Gale has no way of knowing that he is in Katniss' mind as she confronts her own fury against the cruelty and injustice the Capitol inflicts on all citizens of Panem. (Peeta is in her mind as well when she remembers his words on the roof: "I keep wishing I could think of a way to show the Capitol they don't own me," words she hadn't understood at the time.)

The next day is miserable for Gale and Hazelle and Prim and Ahngora. They all ache with sympathy for Katniss, for finding a friend and ally and losing her only one day later, until later that night she is granted an ally she doesn't have to fear losing. Claudius Templesmith's voice booms through the arena explaining the rule change: both tributes from one district can win if they are the last two alive. Katniss and Peeta can both live.

Katniss sits up in her tree and calls out Peeta's name with heartrending need.


	4. The First Kiss

_Thanks to Ilovemycrazygoofyweirdfriends for this chapter's inspiration and to LeahLucy, Mockingjay1804, Sheila Chiaroscura and Ilovemyfriends. for their encouragement! Ever body needs encouragement, as Haymitch would say. By the way, his accent is a hybrid of my Grandmother's (from "down the shore" in Maryland) and the good ol' "ridnick" that I used to hear when I was a kid. _

_**Peeta Dreams**_

Peeta lies restlessly by the stream as his wound festers and his fever rises. He sleeps fitfully and dreams, mostly dreams of Katniss with an occasional visit from Cato or his sword. When he is awake he's not always sure of where he is or why he is where he is. During his lucid periods he tries to remember what is real and what is dream. Are he and Katniss in love? He knows for sure that he loves Katniss. Did he save her life or did she save his? Were they friends during the training, or was that pretend? He occupies himself by making a camouflage of leaves and mud and vines. He drinks from the stream but after vomiting up one of the packs of snack food he no longer tries to eat. Sometimes he remembers to take the pill for the water, and sometimes he doesn't. It doesn't seem to make any difference, so probably the stream is safe and clean. Peeta can't keep a schedule but he's awake when the trumpets sing out followed by the announcement that two can win the Games if they are from the same district. From a distance he hears Katniss call out "Peeta!"

In the morning when Katniss finds Peeta he is mostly lucid but his hours of dreaming have altered his reality, and now he thinks that Katniss and he are mutually in love and he's completely forgotten about Gale. He remembers his dad saying something good might come of the Games and Haymitch saying he should focus on living happily ever after with Katniss but not to tell anybody that. The announcement last night confirms to him what both his dad and Haymitch said, so when he hears Katniss whisper his name he thinks his dearest dreams have come true.

_**Snow Deals with Seneca**_

As Plutarch expected, President Snow is outraged by the rule change to allow two victors from the same district. The Gamesmaker is immediately responsible for this catastrophe, so he must be executed at once. After the Games Snow will dig into the matter to see if anyone else should be punished, but Seneca kept the secret between himself and Plutarch. Plutarch will be safe but Seneca is in deep, deep trouble.

Snow's personal guards raid the Games headquarters, rampaging through the halls and roaring for Seneca Crane. When they find him tucked under a table they use stun guns to immobilize him and two guards each clutch a handful of his hair and drag him out to the hovercraft. Snow's senior guard is a rebel, part of the topmost echelon of the Rebellion, (and one of the best kept secrets among the rebels). He must capture Seneca, deliver him to Snow and carry out Snow's orders, without allowing Seneca to speak and thus compromise Plutarch. Luckily Snow is too engrossed by the Games – Cato and Thresh are at war in the tall grass – to be as interested as he normally would be in Seneca's death.

"Why, it'ssss Sssssseneca Crane!" Snow hisses at the prisoner, and then commands the guards "Throw him in the pit and come back at once, I've got another job for you." The pit is filled with truly horrible muttations that will feed ravenously on anything but each other. Normally the guards would watch and enjoy the dreadful spectacle, but the rebel guard had manufactured some trouble elsewhere so that Snow would assign them another task before Seneca regained the ability to speak.

Plutarch is a pragmatic sort of rebel. He knows he sent Seneca Crane to his death, he knows how Seneca will die, and he knows that he is the one who caused Seneca's troubles. He is sorry for Seneca, but he doesn't trouble himself with guilt as Katniss would. He doesn't even feel responsible. He believes the Capitol and Snow are responsible, because Snow has eliminated all other choices but to fight back against Snow's system in Snow's way.

Plutarch is made Gamesmaker and the Games go on. Now that he doesn't have to curry favor with the boss, Plutarch begins to drop the annoying Capitol accent and talk like a normal person. Cinna, the Rebellion's master of style, had told him at the beginning of the Games that Plutarch could not use the Capital accent among the rebels of the 13 Districts; no rebel would take him seriously if he talked like that. Plutarch is getting ready to talk to rebels outside the Capitol.

_**Katniss Comes for Peeta**_

I hear her voice before I see her and I'm so happy I blink a couple of times to make sure I'm awake and not dreaming. But it's Katniss, it's really Katniss. She hauls me out of my comfortable bed in the stream and proceeds to torment me by cleaning me and treating my injuries. I would have preferred a gentler welcome, for instance she could have lain right down beside me; I would have made her very comfortable and invisible as well! But I do what she tells me because I'm so happy to see her.

But DAMN, some of her ministrations HURT. I can't not holler as she moves me, though I try to be quiet. She washes the mud off me; the cool water and her cool hands stroking my feverish skin are very nice and soothing. I feel the relief as the venom and infection is drained from each tracker jacker sting, but my thigh is hurting more than anything, and unfortunately that wound seems beyond even a healer's daughter. She looks pretty sick as she's working on it, so I tease her for a kiss to take my mind off the pain and her mind off the pus that so clearly disgusts her. I long to kiss her, I've been dreaming of kissing her for days, but now that she's with me I can barely move myself and I'm even to weak to reach out to hold her.

We start walking and I forget why we're moving and where we're going as a voice nags me inside to just LIE DOWN. When I'm starting to fall, Katniss catches me and helps me sit for a while. Then we haul me to a little cave where Katniss makes a bed and tucks me in. I watch her build a front wall for our little cave and weird thoughts flicker through my mind, like flashing pictures instead of words. I see first-grade Katniss singing to the birds, I see 11-year old Katniss shrinking away from my mother's harsh words, I see Katniss the next day looking like she has two good meals inside her. I see her twirling during her interview, and with her head turned away, blushing and confused after mine. Then I see Haymitch warning me Katniss wouldn't understand that I was telling the truth when I said I love her, so I have to tell her now, in case I die.

"Katniss, " I say. She comes over to me and strokes my hot forehead with her cool hand. "Thanks for finding me."

"You would have found me if you could," she says.

"Yes. Look, if I don't make it back – "

"Don't talk like that. I didn't drain all that pus for nothing," she says.

"I know. But just in case I don't – " I try again to explain that I truly do love her, it's not a Games strategy, it's how I feel.

"No, Peeta, I don't even want to discuss it," She touches my lips with her fingers, and I want to kiss them, but I have to explain.

"But I – " I try to insist, but her lips brush mine in a tentative kiss. Her face lingers above me so I reach for a deeper kiss while her hand steadies my wobbly head. Her eyes close and for a moment we're melded into one being, alive with love. She pulls away first and tucks the sleeping bag more firmly around my shoulders. I've never kissed a girl before and something in her face tells me she's never kissed a boy either. I guess a kiss is a way to say 'I love you,' so for the moment I'm satisfied that she knows what she wouldn't let me say.

"You're not going to die. I forbid it. All right?"

If I'm not going to die I reckon I'll have more chances to kiss and to talk, so I give in, "All right," and fall asleep for a few minutes while she steps outside the cave. When she returns with the pot of hot broth I want her to have it, but she insists I drink it. She wheedles and makes idle threats and even bribes me with kisses me to get all the broth down my throat. These kisses are delightful of course, but even though I had my first kiss only an hour ago, I now know the difference between a loving kiss and a fun kiss. It's like the difference between throwing those loaves of bread to Katniss when she was starving in the rain and selling bread over the counter in the bakery, or the difference between the sun, which gives us life, and the moon, which is merely beautiful.

When I wake in the morning Katniss is gone and I'm almost in a panic when she returns with berry soup for me. Eventually I persuade her to sleep and when I brush her hair off her face she seems to relax a little, so I stroke her hair until I'm sure she's asleep. The constant tension of the Games and her natural intensity drain from her face and body and she almost looks serene. Her face gains a different kind of beauty when she's asleep, a restful beauty, and I feast my eyes on her all day long.

When she wakes up the focus unfortunately turns back on me, and on my wound and the infection that has now entered my blood.

_**Gale**_

The last time Gale saw Katniss was the day of the reaping when he was hustled out of the room in the Justice Building while trying to tell her he loves her. "Don't let them starve!" Katniss cried out, clinging to Gale's hand. "I won't. You know I won't! Katniss, remember I – " but the Peacekeepers yanked them apart and Katniss never heard him finish the sentence when he was shoved out onto steps of the Justice Building, " – love you." If Katniss didn't hear him, it might as well remain unsaid, Gale thought, as he trudged toward home but the momentum behind the declaration had forced the words out. So his love wasn't a secret anymore, but the one person who needed to know it was gone, possibly forever.

That evening as he watched the reapings from the other eleven Districts, Gale assessed the competitors Katniss would face, and became cautiously optimistic for her chances of survival. The career tributes were big and strong, but if the past was indicative of the present, these tributes would only know how to fight. They would not know how to feed themselves, and they would suffer more without food than a hardy hunter and forager like Katniss. When the Games finally started Gale remained cautiously optimistic until the day Katniss blew up the pile of supplies. His optimism rose, and the next day, when Katniss shot Marvel, Gale became confident that Katniss would be the next victor.

Peeta's declaration of love irritated Gale when he made it, mystified Gale while Peeta teamed with the careers, and won Gale's respect when Peeta saved Katniss's life. After Cato wounded Peeta, the severity of his injury and Peeta's isolation eliminated him as a contender in Gale's mind. Gale felt a little guilty that Peeta's plight didn't concern him more, but "all's fair in love and war" is a platitude that makes sense to him.

Then the rules changed, Katniss immediately hunted Peeta down, and sacrificing her own safety, began to nurse him to the best of her ability.

When the kiss occurs Gale is blindsided. He had seen nothing in Katniss's manner to indicate any special affection for Peeta. He had noted Peeta flirting a little with Katniss and Katniss, as usual, had been oblivious. He considers the possibility that the kiss could be faked, because it's filmed so beautifully, close-up in profile, followed by a close-up of Peeta's blissful face. But Gale can't fool himself for long, he's too honest. He absorbs the blows one by one: Katniss gave her first kiss to someone other than him, Katniss initiated the kiss, Peeta perhaps took more than the kiss Katniss meant to give, the whole country saw her first kiss, and it wasn't with him.

Gale knows he's not being fair. Katniss is 16 now, whereas Gale had his first kiss when he was 13. He's kissed lots of girls. Girls run after him; he notices them and he used to respond. Since he realized that Katniss was the girl he wanted for life, he stopped responding to other girls and he's been saving up the flirty, lusty part of himself for Katniss, when she's ready.

He can't stand to watch any more. He sits outside the door where the Peacekeepers can't see him and lets the turmoil boil inside him.

_**The Everdeens**_

Ahngora and Prim watch Katniss nurse Peeta with pride. Her hands are gentle and her determination with the copious amount of pus is close to heroic. Both the healer and her daughter know how quickly Katniss flees the scene when someone sick or injured comes to their house for help. They both giggle at her shyness when she asks Peeta cover himself while she washes his undershorts. Katniss doesn't like nakedness of any kind, physical or emotional. So they are astonished when she kisses Peeta, and he kisses her back, a kiss Ahngora recognizes for what it is on Peeta's side – love spoken in a caress.

Mother and daughter had been on the edge of their seats since Katniss found Peeta. Ahngora sighs and leans back as one tension is eased – Peeta's OK for now – and another takes its place – Katniss in love? Prim sighs ecstatically and remains on the edge of her seat, eager for more romance and kisses and talk of love. Then she senses her mother's disquiet and asks, "Why did you sigh, Mama? Don't you like Peeta?"

"I like him very much from the little I know about him. But I don't think Katniss is ready to have a boyfriend or to kiss and talk about love. Besides, Gale also loves her, though she doesn't know it. I think there will be tears because of this."

_**Haymitch**_

The rule change was just announced. Plutarch hinted at this a while back. There's Katniss hollering for Peeta. Well, I'll be . . .

Ha! Here's Katniss hunting Peeta down. That gash on his thigh is gonna be real trouble. I'm gonna have to get him some serious medicine. We got sponsors enough to pay for it, but the other mentors will claim District 12 got an unfair advantage. I reckon I'll have to negotiate with ever body, see how each District can get something valuable like them drugs. Cato and Thresh are hurting each other pretty bad. Foxface needs food, she's gonna starve in a couple'a days. That dimwit Clove is still looking for Foxface, she's passed under Foxface in a tree twice. I hear from Plutarch folks are saying she's too stupid to deserve the victor's crown . . .

Whaddya know! Katniss jest kisst Peeta and damn if he didn't kiss her back, a real good kiss. She's definitely a virgin kisser. Peeta kisses like he knows how but I don't reckon he can have much experience either. Well, he's got true love to guide him. Where's that sponsor with the broth for him, he sure deserves it now . . .


	5. Homecoming

Peeta

Home. Home at last. Home sweet home. Home is where the heart is. Yeah, well if that were true home would be next door where Katniss lives with her mother and sister. Peeta invites his family to share his victor's house but his mother and father don't want to be so far from the bakery. His brothers stay in the house for a week or so, but they just don't feel comfortable. Peeta doesn't know if his restless and dissatisfied state is the problem, or if it's the house itself. A victor's house is a big and empty space filled with mindless luxuries, not necessarily comfortable.

Alone, confused, having lost the love he thought he'd finally won, Peeta begins to bake and paint. In one day he can bake enough bread to feed a family in the Seam for a week, so once again Peeta becomes The Boy With The Bread. He bakes good hearty breads, some with cheese, some with raisins and nuts, some with wholesome herbs and one sweet loaf that is more like a cake then a bread. When it's cool enough he packs it all into a flour sack and waits until all the lights have winkled out in the Seam. Then he skulks his way into the Seam and leaves the bag at some family's front door. Peeta visits a different house every night, remembering everything he learned from Katniss about moving quietly. He doesn't want to be caught by Peacekeepers or the people he bakes for.

His brothers know what he's doing because they bring the sacks of flour he needs nearly every day but so far as he knows no one else, even Katniss, knows about it. In the Seam no one speaks of the bread that shows up overnight. Peeta is the prime suspect, but these gifts of bread are so _not_ in the spirit of the Capitol that everyone assumes it's illegal. No one wants to jeopardize either the giver or the gifts.

When Peeta isn't baking he's painting. Portia suggested he try painting for his talent, and as it turns out, Peeta really does have a talent for portraying the most visceral feelings in the most horrific scenes. Portia calls his work "the fine art of horror." because it evokes exactly what a tribute in the Hunger Games faces. Some are beautiful, but none are beautified. The paintings are all searingly honest.

Any Games survivor has his share of post-traumatic strees, but Peeta is more wounded by Katniss' deception and by Haymitch championing her deception than he is by the Games themselves. For Peeta much of the horror in the Games was veiled by his love for Katniss. He was also spared the tracker jacker hallucinations, he didn't have sing his ally to her death after failing to prevent her capture, he didn't have to pretend a love he didn't feel, and he killed only one tribute deliberately. Somehow Peeta knows that Katniss bears a heavier burden after the games, but he is still too raw from her deception to have any comfort to offer her. But as he kneads his bread and draws the scenes he'll paint, some of them scenes Katniss described to him in their cave, Peeta has time to think and to piece together what he knew and when he knew it.

He knew when he talked to Haymitch and when he declared his love for Katniss to all of Panem that she did not love him. He knew that in District 12 the three people he saw her with were Prim, Madge and Gale: her sister, her classmate, and Gale. What was Gale to Katniss? He hadn't known before the Games and he doesn't know now. There never seemed to be anything romantic in their relationship, but Katniss is not a demonstrative person, he'd learned that by the tenseness in her body as she cozied up to him in their interviews. She'd had to will herself to lay her hand in his lap or her head on his shoulder, while he'd felt utterly natural sitting almost entwined with her.

He'd known during training that their "friendship" had been at the request of their stylists and that eventually it wore Katniss out. She'd asked him to drop it when they were in their training quarters, safe from the eyes of other tributes. He hadn't known why the stylists wanted them to be friendly then, and he didn't know now. He asked Portia, but she didn't know either.

He remember his father's observation that something good might come of the games, and he remembered Haymitch's recommendation to hope for and work for the outcome in which both he and Katniss lived happily ever after. He'd known then that Katniss was not in love with him, but at some point he'd lost track of reality and when Katniss found him in the stream he believed that they loved each other. Everything she did seemed to reinforce that belief. Why? Why had she done that? He remembers Haymitch trying to explain a games strategy and Katniss understanding the strategy idea in a way Peeta hadn't. Had Haymitch told her to pretend? Maybe he could ask Haymitch. Maybe not. Maybe. Maybe not. Whatever. Eventually the Games will force them together again and by then he'll know what to do and say. In the meantime he bakes and he paints.

Plutarch

One of the worst things about fomenting a revolution in Panem is getting around the districts to talk and plan with other rebels. In Panem you need a reason and permission to move from one district to another. As Gamesmaker Plutarch could manufacture reasons to travel, but Snow would eventually become suspicious of his need to visit the more unattractive districts like 12. Another difficulty is transportation. There are trains that move around the districts, but they are for freight, not travelers. Plutarch has no success finding a rebel amongst the rail workers but eventually he works out a system that requires more effort but is probably safer for everybody, though not at all comfortable for Plutarch, since he has to travel as potatoes or cooking oil or bauxite.

Though there are telephones in Panem, there is no reliable postal system. Generally only the wealthier people have phones, but there is one in the Hob near Greasy Sae's counter, and she likes answering it so much that it is unofficially her phone. When Plutarch wants to meet with Haymitch he leaves a message with Sae, a message that sounds real, but is in code, and from this message Haymitch can figure out the day and time and train car Plutarch will be on. When Plutarch goes to District 12 he travels in Peeta's art supplies – canvas, wood for framing, paints and brushes and turpentine – which is not the worst accomodation he puts up with for the cause.

They have to cover a lot of ground when Plutarch and Haymitch meet, so Haymitch has to go into detox a week before Plutarch's arrival. Plutarch suggests it would be easier to stay dry than to clean up every time he comes to District 12, but Haymitch ignores the hint.

"Jest tell me what ye came here for so's I can hep ye into that box a bauxite yer goin' to District 11 in."

They can't talk in Haymitch's house and Plutarch can't be seen in public so Haymitch smuggled Plutarch into another victor's house in a basement room that Haymitch soundproofed at night in one of his dry periods.

"Yes, alright. No helpful hints from Plutarch, even though I'm just thinking of your welfare. Well, here's where we stand: The tributes for the 75th Games are going to be drawn from the pool of victors."

"Jesuskrist!" Haymitch is a creative cusser, but this news calls for the worst in swear words. No one remembers exactly what this word means anymore, just that it's the worst thing you can say. "That the real 3rd quarter quell, or is it one a yer evil tricks?"

"I'm afraid it's one of my evil tricks. It's the only way we can coordinate the efforts of the other tributes to get Katniss and Peeta out."

"Yeah, I kin see thas so. Ye think we can git 'em both?"

"No, I think it's far more likely that we'll try for both and manage one. And we have a storm brewing with President Coin, because she wants to rescue Peeta rather than Katniss."

"Don't she know who is the Mockingjay?"

"No, I'm afraid she doesn't. She doesn't understand the concept. I'm afraid they're an awfully unemotional lot in District 13. Perhaps it's because they live so far underground and never see the outside and because there are so many rules – I don't know, but they don't seem to understand imagery at all."

"Ye lost me at she doesn't."

"Right, well she doesn't. I don't think I'll be able to persuade her alone, so we're probably going to have to get a number of rebels – Cinna and Finnick and Beetee and Johanna – together with her. It's her hovercraft and her soldiers, so obviously she has to believe in the mission."

"She give ye her reasons?'

"Not in so many words, but what it boils down to is that Katniss won't do what she's told, which is quite true, and which is part of what makes her the Mockingjay."

"Dam' fool. Pretty risky scheme to git a buncha us together to convince one ornery woman to see sense."

"We'll have to get together anyway so that everybody understands the plan exactly the same way. I'll keep working on her, though, but can you help me compile reasons why Katniss is the Mockingjay? You'd be better at this then I would because you've seen her with non-Capital people."

"Yeah, OK . . . ummmmm . . . "

"One is . . ?"

"District 12 – they give the salute to Katniss only. None a Effie's applause, jes the salute. 'Cause she goin agin the Capital by takin' over fer Prim."

"Two . . .?"

"District 11 – they sent her bread after Rue died. 'Cause she loved Rue like they was sisters. She grieved for Rue. Ain't sposed to grieve at the Hunger Games."

"Three . . .?"

"Uh – When she offered Peeta them poison berries. All her idea. She even had to talk him into it. He argued to stay and die. Give up too easy, he does."

"Four . . ."

"What she did with the berries kinda lit a fire under a whole lotta rebel butts. People seein' possibilities there."

"Five . . ."

"Well, what's a mockingjay annyway? It's a mutt what turned itself agin the Capital. And Katniss, when she want her way, she goes agin the Capital. And when she want her way it ain't never for herself – it's for Prim or Peeta or Rue or Gale 'n his famly.."

"Six . . ."

"Why am I doin yer work? If'n you don't know why she's the Mockingjay what are you headin' this rebellion for?"

"Because, my dear Haymitch, you have a poetical voice when you talk of Katniss and the rebellion, a voice that represents all the rebels, not specifically me. Coin can argue with me, but the rebels have the last word. Coin wants the rebellion to succeed, so it really does matter to her that we have an emblem of the rebellion that can, as you put it, light a fire under a "whole lotta rebel butts."

"Ye lost me at Haymitch. Les git outta here. I gotta pack yer butt in a box a bauxite. Oh – and don't ferget she shot at ye Gamesmakers at the training and then ye lot gave her that 12 like you was puttin' a big fat target on her. But she still won. Coin should love that."


End file.
